I Just Want To Shout It From On Top Of A Mountain, Once Again

I may not be a confident blogger yet, being that this is my first ever foray into blogging, but I am stone fucking confident about one thing...The Philadelphia Phillies will be "World Fucking Champions" in 2011. Halladay, Lee, Oswalt, and Hamels. Hamels, Oswalt, Lee and Halladay. I can't take this anymore.

This season, every MLB team is going to be sounding like Squints from The Sandlot, but they won't be referencing Wendy Peffercorn. What they will be referring to is the Phillies starting rotation. The most dominant, high-powered rotation in the past 15 years, possibly EVER. That's right, I said it, EVER. If you don't like it, I will fuck a kid up. Well I probably won't do that, because I'm a lover, not a fighter (actually a pussy, but it sounds better) but I will explain why I so strongly feel this way.

The Braves had an incredible rotation in the early 90's with the likes of Greg Maddux, Tom Glavine, John Smoltz and Steve Avery. That was the best starting pitching staff of my lifetime. Granted I'm not Besse Cooper, but I've seen enough baseball to know a hand full of aces. As a side note, names like Besse, Beatrice, Eunice, Gertrude and Bertrum just don't exist anymore and they fucking should. Instead, today we have names like JaMarcus, Rumer, Kyd, Pilot Inspektor, Blanket and Jermajesty. Leave it to the Jackson's to come up with those last two beauties, because there is crazy and then there are the Jackson's, but I digress. The only problem, maybe not problem, but issue that in my opinion makes this new Phillies staff destined to be better than the Braves staff is that only John Smoltz was a power pitcher. All 4 members of the Phillies have the potential to rack up more strikeouts than those creeps on Millionaire Matchmaker. There is nothing more vital than being able to work out of jams by not letting hitters make contact. That is the single best way to limit potential big innings and therefore win a shit ton of baseball games. Not having to rely on fielders to make defensive plays means reducing the number of opportunities for mistakes (in this case, errors) to occur, further reducing the oppositions ability to get additional men on base via any method but by getting actual hits. Because these guys also DON'T issue walks. I also wouldn't be suprised to see all 4 reach 200 Strikeouts and 15 wins each. That is why I believe they have the unique possibility of being greatest pitching staff, ever. Period. Cut and dry. End of Story.

So good fucking luck to the other 29 teams in Major League Baseball, because We Going to the 'Ship.